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is rejection stopping me from being seen?
understanding your score.
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exploring whether fear of rejection is keeping you from building real connection.
this self-assessment is specifically for gay men who’ve found themselves holding back—staying quiet, playing it cool, or not reaching out at all. if you’ve ever stopped yourself from initiating, sharing, or showing up fully because you feared being ignored, misunderstood, or unwanted—this is for you.
scoring.
👉 14 - 18 points → you’re leading with courage — keep going.
🌱 you’re beginning to trust that rejection doesn’t define you. you’re showing up more fully, speaking more freely, and allowing yourself to take up space without shrinking. connection feels more possible because you’re making space for truth, not just approval. keep leaning into this version of you — the brave, open one.
Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach
this book is a powerful guide to making peace with imperfection. it invites you to stop the inner war, drop unrealistic expectations, and lead with presence, compassion, and self-trust.
book recommendation.
👉 7 - 13 points → you’re stuck in the middle — but aware.
🌱 you’re aware of the walls, the hesitations, and the patterns that keep you from being fully seen — and that’s a powerful place to be. you want connection, but fear still whispers in your ear: “protect yourself.” this is your invitation to start choosing truth over perfection, expression over performance. connection asks us to risk being real.
Attached by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller
this book explores how attachment styles impact the way we connect, pull away, or cling. it’ll help you name your patterns and build safer, more honest relationships — both with others and yourself.
book recommendation.
👉 0 - 6 points → fear might be leading right now.
🌱 you may be living in protection mode — not reaching out, not sharing, not risking. rejection (real or imagined) might be shaping your self-worth more than you realize. it’s okay. you’re not broken — you’re just guarded. this is your call to begin softening, step by step, until your truest self feels safe to be seen.
The War of Art by Steven Pressfield
this book helps you identify internal resistance and push past fear. it’s a bold call to stop hiding and start creating a life built on courage and intention — even when rejection shows up.
book recommendation.
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